Give your brother seventy excuses


The saying “give your brother seventy excuses” has been on the tongues of many Muslims but how many of us know the origins of this saying?

InshaAllah this small research will be helpful.

الْعَبَّاسِ بْنِ جُلَيْدٍ الْحَجْرِىِّ قَالَ سَمِعْتُ عَبْدَ اللَّهِ بْنَ عَمْرٍو يَقُولُ جَاءَ رَجُلٌ إِلَى النَّبِىِّ -صلى الله عليه وسلم- فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ كَمْ نَعْفُو عَنِ الْخَادِمِ فَصَمَتَ ثُمَّ أَعَادَ عَلَيْهِ الْكَلاَمَ فَصَمَتَ فَلَمَّا كَانَ فِى الثَّالِثَةِ قَالَ اعْفُوا عَنْهُ فِى كُلِّ يَوْمٍ سَبْعِينَ مَرَّةً

[al-`Abbas bin Julaid al-Hajariy said: I heard `Abdullah ibn `Amro (ra) say: A man came to the Prophet (SAWS) and said: “O Apostle of Allah! how often shall I forgive a servant?” He gave no reply, so the man repeated what he had said, but he still kept silence. When he asked a third time, he replied: “forgive him seventy times daily”.

source: Sunan abu Dawoud – al-Albani said “SAHIH”.]

قال عمر بن الخطاب رضي الله عنه : إن أناساً كانوا يؤخذون بالوحي في عهد رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم ، وإن الوحي قد انقطع ، وإنما نأخذكم الآن بما ظهر لنا من أعمالكم ، فمن أظهر لنا خيرا أمناه وقربناه وليس إلينا من سريرته شيء الله يحاسبه في سريرته ، ومن أظهر لنا سوءاً لم نأمنه ولم نصدقه وإن قال : إن سريرته حسنة .

[Narrated Ameer `Umar bin Al-Khattab (ra): “People were (sometimes) judged by the revealing of a Divine Inspiration during the lifetime of Allah’s Apostle but now there is no longer any more (new revelation). Now we judge you by the deeds you practice publicly, so we will trust and favor the one who does good deeds in front of us, and we will not call him to account about what he does secretly, for Allah will judge him for that; but we will not trust or believe the one who presents to us evil deeds even if he claims that his intentions were good.”

source: Sahih al-Bukhari.]

عن عمر قال من عرض نفسه للتهمة فلا يلومن من أساء به الظن ، ومن كتم سره كانت الخيرة في يده ، وضع أمر أخيك على أحسنه حتى يأتيك منه ما يغلبك

[Ameer `Umar bin Al-Khattab (ra) said: “He who exposes himself to accusations can only blame himself if he is accused. One who guards his secrets is surely safe. And always think well of your brother’s doings until he clearly shows you otherwise.”

source: al-Zuhd by abu Dawoud.]

هشام بن الكلبي قال : قال جعفر بن محمد :  إذا بلغك عن أخيك الشيء تنكره فالتمس له عذرا واحدا إلى سبعين عذرا ، فإن أصبته وإلا قل لعل له عذرا لا أعرفه

[Hisham al-Kalbi narrated from Ja`far bin Muhammad (al-Sadiq) (rah): “If you heard something that you hate about your brother, then try to find him an excuse or up to seventy, if you find it then that is well, if you don’t then say: maybe he has a reason I do not know.”

source: al-Beihaqi in Shu`ab al-Iman.]

عن أبي علي الثقفي سمعت حمدون القصار يقول : إذا زل أخ من إخوانكم فاطلبوا له سبعين عذرا ، فإن لم يقبله قلوبكم فاعلموا أن المعيب أنفسكم ، حيث ظهر لمسلم سبعين كذا  عذرا فلم يقبله

[abu `Ali al-Thaqafi said: I heard Hamdoun al-Qassar (rah) say: “If a brother of yours commits a mistake then look for seventy excuses for him, if your heart never accepts any of them, then know that the flaw is in you, because you as a Muslim did not accept seventy or so excuses.”

source: abu `Abdul-Rahman al-Sulami in Adab al-Suhbah.]

عن محمد بن سيرين قال :
إذا بلغك عن أخيك شيئٌ فالتمس له عذراً ، فإن لم تجد له عذراً فقل لعل له عذراً .

[Muhammad ibn Sereen (rah) said: “If something bad reaches you from your brother then find him an excuse, and if you never find one then say: Maybe he has some excuse.”]

source: al-Tawbeeth wal-Tanbeeh by abi al-Sheikh.

أبوقلابة : التمس لأخيك العذر بجهدك ، فإن لم تجد له عذراً فقل لعل لأخي عذراً لا أعلمه .

[abu Qulabah (rah) said: “Try your best to find an excuse to your brother, if you do not find one then say: Maybe my brother has one that I do not know.”

source: ibn abi al-Dunya in Mudarat al-Nas.]

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.